And Tell No One

 

 

I'm unable to confirm this quote, so take the attribution with a grain of salt.  It's one of those quotes that's all over the internet, but never with a primary source; when nobody knows what book or speech it came from, that makes me suspicious.

But I think it's a useful quote, regardless of who said it first.

It's human to want to share things, and that can be a very good thing.  When we experience something that sparks joy, our first impulse is to find someone to share it with.  We experience the joy a second time through them.

It can be healing to share a trauma.

But sometimes, I want to keep it to myself. I want to control the narrative.

Anything shared becomes communal.  When you share something, you're going to get feedback, and that can't help but mold the experience into something new.  

I remember sharing a song with my friend Mary years ago, and instead of hearing how much she liked it, her response was just the opposite.  She told me that it was a horrible song, poorly done, and it made her sad to listen to it.  Well, that might not have "ruined a beautiful thing," but it certainly changed it for me in a way I wish she hadn't.  (FWIW, here's the song:  YouTube Link)

Most things I share.  

Some things I share only with Mona.  

And a few things I keep just for me.